In His grace, God has brought me back again to Habakkuk to gently redirect me and point out my own sinfulness. How sweet He is with His children, yet never yielding His own glory or sovereignty. How loving He is to hold us in His arms while we hurt, but then show us a bit of His splendor when the tears have been wiped away and our hearts are ready to hear.
"Of what value is an idol, since a man has carved it? Or an image that teaches lies? For he who makes it trusts in his own creation; he makes idols that cannot speak" Habakkuk 2:18 What an idol I have started to create to replace the God of the Bible. My idol doesn't take children to heaven at age twelve. My idol just might not have eternity planned out from beginning to end, including February 18, 2011. My idol just might not understand a mothers breaking heart. My idol wouldn't make their children hurt to pry their hands off of this world and turn their deceiving hearts to needing no other earthly thing, replacing it with their only need being God Himself. My idol needed to be smashed before I carved any more details into it.
"Has not the Lord Almighty determined...." Habakkuk 2:13 Has not the Lord Almighty determined the ways of salvation? Has not the Lord Almighty determined how His glory will be revealed in the most magnanimous ways? Has not the Lord Almighty determined He would answer my prayers and make Trent dwell in heaven for eternity? Has not the Lord Almighty determined that He would prove Himself faithful beyond what I could comprehend without this? Has not the Lord Almighty determined the ways and the end and the depth of this pain and grief, only to prove Himself more faithful? Has not the Lord Almighty declared that this life is a mist, even mine? Has not the Lord Almighty used this as a wake up call for not only me, but so many others for salvation, that in eternity I will praise Him all the more?
"But the righteous will live by his faith...." Habakkuk 2:4b Will I live by my faith? Faith in what? My own ideas and idol of this God of the universe, or the real God who I only know through my Bible? My faith is so small. My mind so quickly forgets His promises. My heart is so easily swayed by the pain. How gracious of God to be the one who is faithful.
"For the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea." Habakkuk 2:14 But the earth is not yet filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord. We still live in enemy territory. The deceit is everywhere~ it trickles into even the believers heart and makes us lose hope. We live short minded and get discouraged. I forget the end. I only know how to live in the now. But one day, one day, the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord. One day I will live eternally with my Savior. How I long to be found living faithfully until that day comes. How I long to be trusting and serving until it comes, rather than crying in my bed. How I long to walk it hand in hand with Jesus.
"But the Lord is in His holy temple; let all the earth be silent before Him." Habakkuk 2:20 God knows what He's doing. How I pray for Him to let me trust Him in that. I try to envision Him sitting on His holy throne, His robes filling the courts, the multitude of angels and witnesses, with Jesus on His right side, with Trent before Him, face to face, knowing what I cannot imagine, longing to see for myself. The Lord is in His holy temple and He does know what He's doing. One day I will too. For today I just trust.
"His splendor was like the sunrise; rays flashed from His hand, where His power was hidden." Habakkuk 3:4 "His ways are eternal." Habakkuk 3:6b Splendor that I cannot even imagine. Power that I cannot even imagine. Eternity that I cannot even imagine. I bow, humbled, before this amazing God who loves even me.
"For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told" Habakkuk 1:5b Again, I am humbled to think of how I doubt God's sovereignty. How can I believe what I cannot see? How can I believe when the waves of pain threaten to overtake? Because God said so. I hold on to my life preserver. One day, one day....
"The Sovereign Lord is my strength; He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on the heights." Habakkuk 3:19 Praise your name Lord Jesus.